Sucks to Suck

MHU's Regular Season's Best Reflect Hometown Donkeys

In case you are completely immune to suggestive language, the record breaking undefeated run for Incep-twaff(cic)le in the MHU league circuit for the past two seasons came to a less than championship end at the hands of an experienced Master's team Monday night in the 8pm Final. Injuries and untimely mistakes proved too much for the MHU Finals favorites.



Anyone watching the game would agree that much like their beloved Broncos, Twaffcicle's biggest threat and downfall was completely Twaffcicle, and in no way the team on the other side of the ball. Atypical (very) unforced errors from missed clap catches in the end zone to fatigued turf throws hurt Team USA's Twaffcicle's chances early.

Mental preparedness could have played a factor considering many of the regular season perfect pinkies had lived the good life, raging multiple powder days over the weekend at many of the state's ski resorts. This also meant a couple slight leg injuries on the ladies side for the #1 seed. Meanwhile the underdog team wallowed in their married, student grading, and - whatever the fuck Matthys does - lives over the long weekend. Undoubtedly stewing in their hatred for the idolized, undefeated Twaffcicle team all the while.

Another untimely break on another completely unforced dump throw from yours-truly immediately after half all but sealed the earth-shattering upset result at 9-4.

Since Twaffcicle was coming off a championship season in the MHU Fall league (known as Sexy Denim), the unexpected loss certainly stung, but the veteran squad smartly reacted to it with quiet understanding. Already realizing and learning the ultimate lesson explained below. A stark change to their opponents' over-exaggerated exuberance. OK, maybe it wasn't over-exaggerated, check out the sweet, trophy long sleeves:

Turn the monitor brightness down, maybe?

Seriously, you could sell one of those on the black market for enough to afford a thermostat so you no longer have to run the ceiling fan in February.

On a more serious note, every game has it's own lesson to learn. So what's the lesson here? To not enjoy the gorgeous outdoor adventures the picturesque mountaintops provide to those who dare tame them? Decidedly and obviously not. 

Looking back a mere 24 hours after it's hard to truly say what will filter through the mental sieve that occurs when always attempting to learn from previous stumbles. That being said, there are always instant impressions that should not be overlooked as potential learning opportunities, as well. One such impression completely disregards the beginning of this paragraph. An exception proving the rule, I guess you could say. The lesson to be learned from the Final may not have even occurred in the final at all. Rather, the thing to note stems from a dominant, yet easy semifinal game win immediately preceding the Final.

Not shockingly, it was once again the mental aspect that was lacking for team Twaffcicle. Mentality lapses are seemingly greater in occurrence than lapses in physical fitness and execution, no matter the ultimate - hell, no matter the sport - situation. Admittedly, the reasoning behind any individual mistake can elicit "chicken or the egg"-type arguments. Does the physical toll of a body in fatigue cloud the mind into mental lapses? Or is the feeling of "fatigue" first conceived by the player's mental mindset? In other words, is fatigue a tangible or intangible concept? I tend to lean towards the latter. 

With that in mind, I would suffice to say that the reason for Twaffcicle's Finals demise came from coasting into the Finals in the first place. 

In the semifinal match up against the college kids, everything seemed to go our way. After a blistering 5-0 start, Twaffcicle (understandably) cruised for the rest of the game to a 15-6 win. While understandable, the mentality of minimal effort continued into the Final, and was ultimately our downfall. Because of the lead Twaffcicle gained in the first half (8-2 I believe), we allowed a team way below our level to trade and even gain a break back or two. This is where our mentality did us in. Instead of continuing to upswing and increase our mental and physical advantage, we plateaued - simply because the situation allowed for it. 

Hot Coke-whores, or whatever their name was, on the other hand had a much closer game for their semifinal. They were not afforded the opportunity for their killer instinct - or desire to continue to succeed and win - to lapse. Consequently they came out and took advantage of a more talented, but more relaxed Twaffcicle team in the Final right off the bat.

The bottom line lesson then, is seemingly this: there is NO situation in which the killer "instinct" (think this is a misnomer because this "instinct" can be learned and improved) should be set aside. While allowing a team a break or two back when already up a bunch will most likely not affect that current game's result, it very much affects games further down the road. Am I saying that when up 10-2 you should play as if it were tied 10-10? You're fucking right I am. 

It is human nature to want to ease off the gas pedal when the win is all but secured, especially when the opposing team is filled with close friends, but it must be mentally overtaken by the will to continue to succeed EVERY TIME. Not necessarily to post as smashingly impressive results as possible in score reporter, but to be mentally ahead of the curve for the next game, tournament, season, etc. Whatever the next challenge may be.

Congrats to Kapoor L.L.S., Mr. Billman, Gee Unit, Matthys, Baker "Heart-baker" Pratt and Gabe "Baker-hart" Hart on their dethroning of the #1 seed. An additional congrats to their ladies Hannah "I'm in school long enough to be a super doctor" Jones, Sara "Drum" Major, Natasha "This is MY league, dammit" Johnson, Kristin "KO" Overton, and Kate "My last name could be a city" Newburgh. They were really the difference makers, running our slightly knocked ladies into the ground. Cheers to you. Hopefully, by continuing ya'lls mental fortitude and improving ours, some bagels will be on the menu this upcoming season for unsuspecting Club Open teams chump-zors.

BOUGH